Someone said that marriage is like a deck of cards. We start out with two hearts and a diamond and we end up looking for a club and a spade. No doubt that’s funny because it’s so often true. So many intimate relationships start out strong and end up struggling. The renowned couples researcher Dr. John Gottman tells us that all couples conflict (as if we didn’t already know!) But, some couples conflict better than others. Better means that they don’t necessarily resolve their conflict, but they do manage it. It doesn’t fester and escalate and do long term damage. They understand how to turn toward each other when they conflict. They know how to repair (re-pair). 

A couple stands together in front of their van smiling and embracing after attending a Couples Retreat in Orlando, FL. Couples Retreats are available to people throughout the United States. Learn more about Couples Retreats in Florida here.

We Must Learn to Manage Conflict

But, conflict management is not instinctive. It takes time and patience to learn. And that is part of what we do in a Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat. Conflict in love is not only painful; it’s also confusing. It often makes little sense. It seems so irrational at times. Why do my partner and I seem to get into the same sort of arguments? It’s like a dance we can’t change. What we argue about may change, but the way we argue never does. Why do we act and react as we do? We love each other, but we couldn’t prove it by the way we argue. What is it with us? And when you don’t have good answers, you can draw some pretty scary conclusions. Maybe we just weren’t meant for each other. Maybe we’re just a bad match. Should we give up?

Don’t Throw in the Towel

If that’s where you are, don’t throw in the towel. Hold Me Tight®️ Couples Retreats can make a world of difference. Hold Me Tight®️  Couples Retreat will help you make sense of what so often makes no sense. Hold Me Tight®️ is rooted in attachment science, which says that all humans are hard wired for connection. It’s an emotional survival need. We crave connection from cradle to coffin. Love is a search for a safe, emotional bond with someone who will be there for us, who will be accessible and responsive and engaged. When we find that connection, we are our best self. That is, in fact, an attachment definition of love: a safe emotional connection. 

A happy couple celebrates reconnecting after a Couples Retreat in Orlando, FL. Hold Me Tight® Couples Retreats are available to anyone in the United States. Learn more about the benefits of Couples Retreats in Florida here.

Conflict is Disconnection

But, no relationship is perfect and we inevitably go through times when our partner isn’t there for us: they disappoint us, let us down, sometimes attack us, maybe even betray us. That disconnection is not only painful; indeed, it is traumatic. Our brain tells us that our very survival is at stake. And how we cope with that disconnection is what we call conflict. We might reach toward our partner by blaming or accusing or attacking, hoping to re-connect. Or we might pull away by minimizing or defending or just plain shutting down, hoping to keep things from getting worse. Either way, it’s a good intentions/bad results scenario. 


At a Hold Me Tight®️  Couples Retreat, couples learn that conflict is not about money or kids or sex or religion or in-laws (or any other topic). It’s deeper than that. It’s about disconnection. It’s about a lack of safety and our need for both partners to show up with understanding and openness. In a Hold Me Tight®️ retreat, couples learn to have conversations they never knew how to have, never knew they could have. They learn to connect like never before. 


A couple shares an intimate moment surrounded by flowering trees. Create more moments like these with the help of a Hold Me Tight® Couples Retreat in Orlando. FL. Couples Retreats are available to anyone in the United States. Read on to learn more about Couples Retreats in Florida.

Learn How to Manage Conflict in a Healthy and Constructive Way at a Couples Retreat in Orlando, FL.

Conflict is inevitable. But it need not be destructive. Indeed, couples who can reconnect and re-pair rather than retaliate are well equipped to weather whatever storms come their way. Come find out how to do that at a Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat. Sign up for a Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat today and discover the difference it can make. Your love story awaits its next chapter – don't miss out.



A happy couple embraces and smiles after completing a Hold Me Tight® Couples Retreat in Orlando, FL. Couples Retreats are available to couples throughout the United States.

Have a Safety Plan

We All Need Predictability

By Mark Beck • April 25, 2025
If you are invested in the stock market, it’s been a roller coaster lately. Indeed, perhaps the best short run strategy is to close your eyes and hold on and ride it out—just like on a roller coaster! However you view the market moves we’re seeing—tariffs and the like—one thing is pretty clear: markets don’t like unpredictability. Uncertainty makes markets very nervous. Hence, lots of ups and downs make for tension and trouble. It’s human nature; unpredictability is stressful in any context.

Safety First

By Mark Beck • April 1, 2025
A local factory required all of its employees to attend a safety class. One fellow didn’t really pay attention and when the final exam at the end of the class asked, “In case of a fire, what steps would you take?” the fellow answered, “Large ones!” “Safety First” is a wise strategy, everywhere from the workplace to the highway to healthcare to childcare. Injuries and accidents cost multiplied billions every year and it’s always better to prevent an accident than to treat one. Whatever the setting, people do better when they feel safe.

Curious or Critical

By Mark Beck • March 14, 2025
Somebody said, “Marriage is a never ending conversation.” I think that’s true. It certainly is a never ending education. That’s part of what makes it fun. Everyday I learn something about my wife, Debbie, about how she sees the world and sees me. And I’m often surprised at our different perspectives. We were on the verge of an argument the other day, simply because we both saw the situation very differently. Neither of us were wrong. But, once I realized how Debbie saw things, I understood her actions and reactions much better. And I realized again that a real key to connection lies in understanding, more than being understood. The late Sue Johnson used to say, “People calm down when they feel understood.” I’ve certainly found that to be true.

Love Is a Team Sport

By Mark Beck • January 29, 2025
If you’re a sports fan (specifically, football) this is your favorite time of year. The NFL playoffs showcase the best of the best and even for the non-fanatics out there, some important truths are evident. Football, like many other sports, is a team game. For sure, individual superstars shine, but only because those around them pull together for a common goal. The best teams operate as one. Eleven players, all on the same page: focused, supportive, picking each other up, pursuing the same goal. When they do, they become more than the sum of their parts…highly efficient. They minimize mistakes and overcome them when they happen. When adversity hits, lesser teams slip into fault finding, sniping and looking out for number one. In any sport, if teammates ever become opponents, they can’t win. It’s game over.

Relationship Rescue

By Mark Beck • January 24, 2025
You might remember the cruise ship Costa Concordia that foundered off the coast of Italy in 2012 after her captain carelessly steered her too close to shore. Rocks tore a 175 foot gash in her hull and the ship listed severely to her starboard side, taking on water and running aground. Ultimately, 32 people died and the recovery cost about $2 billion. Perhaps the greatest blunder though, was that the captain waited over an hour to give the order to abandon ship. For such negligence, he was ultimately convicted of manslaughter and sentenced to 15 years. Indeed, he left the ship with 300 passengers still on board! (He said he “fell” into a lifeboat as it was being lowered.)

Help Is Nearby

By Mark Beck • January 17, 2025
I had a close call today. I was almost duped by a very slick hacker. He posed as a security guy from PayPal and I nearly gave him remote access to my computer. (I know, that sounds pretty stupid on my part.) Fortunately for me, when things smelled fishy, I tapped out before any real damage was done. But, I didn’t know what to do from there. I unplugged my PC and called an expert. He knew just what to do and he got me up and running in no time. What a relief! It cost me a few bucks, but most likely saved me a lot more. Computers are a necessary evil in my life. I can’t even imagine managing my home or my business without one. But, they can sure be troublesome. And a cyber wizard, I am not. That’s my problem. I know just enough to be dangerous. It sure eases my mind that help is available when I need it. Because some things I can’t fix. That doesn’t make me stupid…it’s just not my expertise.

Comfort Isn't Always Comfortable

By Mark Beck • January 10, 2025
Intimate relationships are never easy and too many don’t survive. Courtrooms and counselors’ offices are full of couples who didn’t set out to destroy their love; it just looks as if they did. Maybe you’re one of those couples…trying to figure out how you went from newlywed to nearly dead...and you never saw it coming...or you did and you didn't know how to stop it.
A Hold Me Tight couples retreat in Orlando is a great way to ring in the new year

Happy New Year

By Mark Beck • January 2, 2025
A Hold Me Tight couples retreat in Orlando is a great new years resolution

When You Hit Turbulence

By Mark Beck • December 16, 2024
Now and then, I travel by air. I enjoy it, for the most part. But, on one trip, seemingly out of nowhere, the plane hit heavy turbulence. Suddenly, the cabin was shuttering and shaking. I looked outside; the wings were visibly bouncing up and down as the plane lurched and pitched. I tried to hide my fear, but (pardon the pun) it really shook me up. My stomach tightened; my breathing got shallow. I couldn’t think straight. Having such little experience with something like that, I feared we would crash. But, then, I noticed the flight attendants. They were cool as the backside of a pillow…no panic or alarm. I wondered how they could be so calm. Soon the pilot came over the intercom and in a steady, measured voice, explained that turbulence is normal, the plane was built for much, much worse and it would all subside in a few moments. The crew had been through this many times. They understood what was happening and what to do. I was so glad that somebody did! Their calm was contagious. Gradually, I was able to relax and realized that it wasn’t the crisis I had feared it was. That was a game changer. I got through it and now, turbulence isn’t the problem it used to be for me when I fly. It still happens, but I know what it’s about when it does and that gets me through. .

In Person Or Online?

By Mark Beck • December 2, 2024
Vicki and I will start something new in March of 2025. We have been leading in person Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreats at least four times a year for six years now. No two are the same; we always see amazing results and we get more than we give every time. And, in addition to our in person workshops, we’ll also begin offering online Hold Me Tight®️ workshops next year. In person and online workshops are definitely different. Each format has its own advantages. So, what’s different about the two and what is the same and which might be best for you? I’m glad you asked.
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