Hold Me Tight® Couples Workshops
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Happy New Year
So, what about your New Year’s resolutions? About 40% of us resolve to do (or stop doing) something in the new year: save money, get organized, lose weight, quit smoking or some other bad habit, get in shape. (Local gyms are swamped for a few weeks every January.) Resolutions are great, but we all know that most don’t last. In fact, research says that 88% of us will give up on our New Year’s resolutions by the second Friday in January. This year, “Quitter’s Day” will be January 10. Yes, “Quitter’s Day” really is a thing. The reasons we quit are many. Some of us aim too high and set unrealistic goals. Some of us let others drag us down. Some of us simply don’t feel an urgency about our resolution. In other words, it just isn’t worth what reaching our goal will require: the time, effort, expense and so on. At the end of the day, the chances of you sticking to your resolutions depend most on how much reaching your goals matters to you.
You have to ask yourself, “How much is it worth to me?”
Some New Year’s resolutions are more pressing than others, and more worthwhile.
How about resolving to improve your marriage?
How much is that worth to you?
A Truly Worthwhile Resolution
What more worthwhile goal could any of us set, given what we know about the value of healthy intimate relationships? Indeed, few things could be more important or better for us. We know that people in healthy relationships generally enjoy better emotional and physical health, tend to live longer, suffer less anxiety and depression, less addiction and, when they do get sick, tend to heal faster. They tend to enjoy more stable relationships across the board. They tend to advance further in their careers and make more money over the course of a lifetime. They even tend to enjoy more and better sex.
In short, a healthy love relationship pays off in all kinds of ways. It’s a goal well worth pursuing and prioritizing.
And it’s a great New Year’s resolution.
A Resolution That Lasts
But, how can we help you survive “Quitter’s Day?” How can we ensure that this New Year’s resolution lasts much longer than two weeks?
That’s where a Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat comes in. Hold Me Tight®️ is a two day couples workshop with the best track record in the business. It’s based on attachment science and the tenets of Emotionally Focused Therapy. But, Hold Me Tight®️ is not therapy. It’s a low key group experience where couples learn to connect more deeply than ever before—and do it safely and without pressure. No one is put on the spot. Couples go at their own pace.
And, after decades of Hold Me Tight®️ success the world over, 70% of couples who attend not only report excellent results, they say that they are still doing well two years afterward. (That’s two years…not two weeks!)
If any goal is truly worthwhile, improving your love relationship is surely at the top of the list! And the best part of all that is that our next Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreat is next month. It’s the perfect New Year’s resolution. Get in now on something that can truly bring lasting change to the most important relationship in your life.
Sign up today. Space is limited.
- Sign up for our contact list.
- Learn more about Mark and Vicki.
- Prepare for a transformational experience.
Have a Safety Plan
Somebody said, “Marriage is a never ending conversation.” I think that’s true. It certainly is a never ending education. That’s part of what makes it fun. Everyday I learn something about my wife, Debbie, about how she sees the world and sees me. And I’m often surprised at our different perspectives. We were on the verge of an argument the other day, simply because we both saw the situation very differently. Neither of us were wrong. But, once I realized how Debbie saw things, I understood her actions and reactions much better. And I realized again that a real key to connection lies in understanding, more than being understood. The late Sue Johnson used to say, “People calm down when they feel understood.” I’ve certainly found that to be true.
If you’re a sports fan (specifically, football) this is your favorite time of year. The NFL playoffs showcase the best of the best and even for the non-fanatics out there, some important truths are evident. Football, like many other sports, is a team game. For sure, individual superstars shine, but only because those around them pull together for a common goal. The best teams operate as one. Eleven players, all on the same page: focused, supportive, picking each other up, pursuing the same goal. When they do, they become more than the sum of their parts…highly efficient. They minimize mistakes and overcome them when they happen. When adversity hits, lesser teams slip into fault finding, sniping and looking out for number one. In any sport, if teammates ever become opponents, they can’t win. It’s game over.
You might remember the cruise ship Costa Concordia that foundered off the coast of Italy in 2012 after her captain carelessly steered her too close to shore. Rocks tore a 175 foot gash in her hull and the ship listed severely to her starboard side, taking on water and running aground. Ultimately, 32 people died and the recovery cost about $2 billion. Perhaps the greatest blunder though, was that the captain waited over an hour to give the order to abandon ship. For such negligence, he was ultimately convicted of manslaughter and sentenced to 15 years. Indeed, he left the ship with 300 passengers still on board! (He said he “fell” into a lifeboat as it was being lowered.)
I had a close call today. I was almost duped by a very slick hacker. He posed as a security guy from PayPal and I nearly gave him remote access to my computer. (I know, that sounds pretty stupid on my part.) Fortunately for me, when things smelled fishy, I tapped out before any real damage was done. But, I didn’t know what to do from there. I unplugged my PC and called an expert. He knew just what to do and he got me up and running in no time. What a relief! It cost me a few bucks, but most likely saved me a lot more. Computers are a necessary evil in my life. I can’t even imagine managing my home or my business without one. But, they can sure be troublesome. And a cyber wizard, I am not. That’s my problem. I know just enough to be dangerous. It sure eases my mind that help is available when I need it. Because some things I can’t fix. That doesn’t make me stupid…it’s just not my expertise.
Intimate relationships are never easy and too many don’t survive. Courtrooms and counselors’ offices are full of couples who didn’t set out to destroy their love; it just looks as if they did. Maybe you’re one of those couples…trying to figure out how you went from newlywed to nearly dead...and you never saw it coming...or you did and you didn't know how to stop it.
Now and then, I travel by air. I enjoy it, for the most part. But, on one trip, seemingly out of nowhere, the plane hit heavy turbulence. Suddenly, the cabin was shuttering and shaking. I looked outside; the wings were visibly bouncing up and down as the plane lurched and pitched. I tried to hide my fear, but (pardon the pun) it really shook me up. My stomach tightened; my breathing got shallow. I couldn’t think straight. Having such little experience with something like that, I feared we would crash. But, then, I noticed the flight attendants. They were cool as the backside of a pillow…no panic or alarm. I wondered how they could be so calm. Soon the pilot came over the intercom and in a steady, measured voice, explained that turbulence is normal, the plane was built for much, much worse and it would all subside in a few moments. The crew had been through this many times. They understood what was happening and what to do. I was so glad that somebody did! Their calm was contagious. Gradually, I was able to relax and realized that it wasn’t the crisis I had feared it was. That was a game changer. I got through it and now, turbulence isn’t the problem it used to be for me when I fly. It still happens, but I know what it’s about when it does and that gets me through. .
Vicki and I will start something new in March of 2025. We have been leading in person Hold Me Tight®️ couples retreats at least four times a year for six years now. No two are the same; we always see amazing results and we get more than we give every time. And, in addition to our in person workshops, we’ll also begin offering online Hold Me Tight®️ workshops next year. In person and online workshops are definitely different. Each format has its own advantages. So, what’s different about the two and what is the same and which might be best for you? I’m glad you asked.
Dr. Gary Chapman’s “The Five Love Languages” is one of the most popular and prolific couples self-help books in history. Since its initial release in 1992, through several revisions, it has sold over 20 million copies. That’s one popular book! Perhaps you’ve read it. If not, it’s worth your time. Chapman basically contends that romantic love shows up in five ways. He calls them “languages.” In no particular order, they are: personal touch, words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service and giving gifts. The idea is that all of us have a top one or two love languages and that couples can and should know, not only their own love language, but more so, their partner’s. And the more you and your partner speak one another’s language, the more love you’ll both share.
A Hold Me Tight retreat in Orlando is a safe, powerful experience for couples to grow closer together
A Hold Me Tight couples retreat in Orlando helps couples go deeper to manage conflict and connect.